Jason Voorhees...pedicab driver.

The longer I stay in Hanoi, the more I like the place. Let's start with the fact that it's a beautiful city. The construction cranes betray the hard truth that the city will be changing soon into another Asian metrolpolis. Come visit now. Also, the people are friendly and the prices are cheap. With a big influx of tourists, this too will change. Right now, Hanoi is amazing. In ten years it will be moving toward Bangkok.

There are small irritations, however. One of these is the gentle persistence of people trying to sell you things on the street. The tee shirt vendors who tag along will give up after half a block usually. The same for the book vendors and cigarette lighter vendors. The most lackadaisical of the group were the motorcycle taxis and the pedicabs. The motorcycle guys wouldn't even get up from lying down on their scooters to ask if you wanted a ride, they'd just kind of mumble at you from a half-slumber. The pedicabs will ride up next to you, ask if you want a ride, then take off when you shake your head.

Except one guy.



Behind the kind smile lurked some kind of demonic stalker personality. One pedicab driver followed us around like a horror-movie killer. Up and down streets, slowly matching our pace. We go in a store, he waits outside. We stop to have lunch, he waits outside. Instead of the "kill kill kill killl" whsipery sounds of a horror movie, we hear "mocha cafe....mocha cafe.....mocha cafe...." The worst part was his creepy smile. He followed us along tirelessly for hours. Just when we thought we had given him the shake...he showed back up. We are going back to the old town today and I am sure we will see him. I am taking my camera.

Ha Noi

Just finishing up some thoughts on Bangkok... When I went to the U.S. Embassy, there were some really interesting people waiting for service. I recall thinking the same thing in Amsterdam. There was an 80 year old American guy with his newborn Thai infant (he was getting her a passport). Another American woman had a lovely 7 year old half-thai girl in tow. The girl was the daughter of an American friend of hers. She was trying to get the girl a passport. In order to do that, she was told, the girl's father needed to come to the Embassy as well as the girl's mother. The friend/guardian fretted that the girl's mother would not be willing to come and was told in no uncertain terms that meant no passport. Sadly, the little girl heard all this. A guy on death's door was getting a will notarized, whatever good that did. Another guy was trying to get some property transfered from the estate of his American ex-wife to his Thai daughter, a few people had lost their passports (2 week replacement wait!) and a few, like me, needed extra pages added. I got my pages in ten minutes and moved on.

Leaving Bangkok was uneventful, save for the $57 overweight baggage charge levied by Thai Air Asia for the trip to Vietnam. Snap! The flight itself was only $80!!! Come on, who has a 33 pound total limit on checked baggage for an International flight? Oh, wait, Thai Air Asia, that's who! Good thing they didn't weight ME.

The flight to Hanoi was nice and the airport new and well-organized. I pulled out my fax for the Visa pre-approval expediter, filled out a form, and Voila! Oh wait...I forgot to get a passport photo for the Visa. Panic. No problem, the immigration officer took a picture for me and it cost $2, and he was very nice about it as well. Breezed through customs and the hotel had a car waiting for us. Sadly the driver started the hard-sell on having him take us around everywhere. It was distracting and after five minutes we just stopped paying attention to him and talked to each other or not at all. The hotel is nice, just off West Lake, with a charming view. Here's a shot from the hotel website which is a good idea of what our room is like:




After settling in, we headed out to "Le Tonkin", a popular restaurant built in a renovated French villa. Got there by cab. Traffic in Hanoi is a frightening ballet of cars and scooters. I'd love to have the horn repair concession around here. People ride three-deep on a scooter, grandma, newborns, etc. Helmets are extremely rare. In Bangkok the ladies ride sidesaddle...here only a few do. The weather is very nice - cooler than Bangkok with lovely nights. The food at Le Tonkin was pretty good. The more experimental fare was not that interesting. The great dish was the Pho! I cannot wait to get into town today and look around. Hopefully we can do that soon. I've got some gifts to buy (didn't pick up anything in Bangkok). Our waiter last night:



Our taxi driver from the hotel (a new one) waited for us outside while we had dinner. That was really convenient. Seems like there might be a taxi glut or else I am off by a factor of 10 on my USD-VND conversions. Before calling it a night we went to the hotel bar/disco called "Nutz."



The band cranked out a very weird mix of Donna Summer, Bill Haley and the Comets, James Brown, The Bangles, Labelle, etc.

Sorry about the "Blair Witch Hanoi Nutz Project" video quality...

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8952584062084452651

Off to shop and sightsee!

Is that a Bubbery in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Bubbery or Stubbery? Now that’s a hard choice. I didn’t want plain yogurt, for sure, but how do I choose between those two? They’re supposedly fruits, but I’ve never heard of them. I ask him to repeat himself, so he slows down and enunciates “Bub-Bery or Stub-bery”. Just pick one? But what if I pick Stubbery and it turns out Bubbery is some fantastic local fruit? I’d sure hate to miss out. Awkward silence. Ah, ok, Blueberry and Strawberry. Got it. Make mine Bubbery.

I’ve been to Thailand many times and have until this trip never ventured down to Khao San Road. I don’t think I’ll be back. It’s not that it’s terrible, but it’s just a Thai version of Berkeley’s Telegraph Avenue. Bums, cheap stuff for sale, drug dealers, scammers of all nationalities, broke-ass tourists. Megan was looking for silver beads and we were able to get them for about 20 THB per gram. Good or bad price? I have no idea, but for her, compared with buying in Malaysia or online, she was very happy with the cost. The trip to Khao San Road was mostly uneventful. We grabbed a streetside bowl of fried noodles with egg for about 65 cents, shared it, then found a taxi for the ride back to Sukhumvit.

The taxi idea was probably a mistake, at least to take it all the way back to the hotel at around 5:30pm. I think the best move would have been to take it to the closest BTS Train or MRT subway station. The drive itself took over an hour. That wasn’t the worst part, though… Stepping into the cab, I was surprised to see a woman driver. I suppose there are a few driving around Bangkok, but this was my first experience. It’s wasn’t quite Maggie Cheung in “Sausalito”, but she did have a nice new clean cab. That’s where the “nice” ended however. She seemed to understand “Robinson’s” and “Sukhumvit” but clearly had no idea how to get there. She spent a good five minutes on her cellphone talking to some poor soul trying to get directions. Now, please…from Khao San Road to Sukhumvit, unless you were driving a water buffalo through the fields last week, you should know exactly how to get from one place to the other. Bangkok is a strange and mysterious place, however. Before I get too sidetracked with the story of her getting lost, let me file my primary complaint: the woman was a maniac! She made car after car slam on their brakes and blast the horn, sent scooters flying like bowling pins, and had Megan and I ready to puke in our shopping bags. She used two feet to drive her automatic deathmobile – one on the gas and one on the brake – and she churned them like a church organist. When it became clear that she was going to take us on a never-ending Autopia nightmare, I called our hotel and got the concierge. I explain to him our dilemma and then handed the phone to the maniac. After what must have been another five minutes (poor concierge!) we heard the blessed “ka ka ka” of understanding, got the phone back, and were home in another ten minutes. We were never so happy to get out of a cab. I’ve been in smelly cabs, cabs with bad suspensions, cabs with obnoxious drivers, cabs with random other passengers (Greece)…but this was the ride I never want to duplicate. That woman should not be driving…ANYTHING…much less a taxicab!

I mention the Concierge at our hotel…and I have to note that the entire hotel stay was superb. The staff was simply fantastic, from the greeting and introduction we got from our check-in host to the bellman who saw us on our way to the airport. Every single request was handled promptly, efficiently, and accurately. The genuine warmth of the staff was also a rare treat in a big-city hotel. Let me note a couple of examples. I called the concierge and asked if they knew of a travel agency that could help me with getting a visa for China. They said to come down to the concierge desk and they’d take care of it…and take care of it they did! They had the Visa form right there at the desk (they had forms for many, many countries), took my passport, had the travel agency courier pick it up, take it to the Chinese Embassy, get the Visa issued, and all returned back to me the same day. It doesn’t get any easier than that. Last night we wanted to have dinner at Koi and I called the restaurant directly to try and make reservations. They would not accept a reservation for two for the time we wanted. I am not exactly sure why, but I think they only take reservations for groups for six or more… At any rate, frustrated, I called our Concierge and explained what we wanted. Ten minutes later, an envelope is slipped under the door which has a letter confirming our reservation for two at 7:30, as well as a business card from Koi and taxi instructions. Due to my getting sick, we needed to have the room made-up at odd hours. A call to guest services and housekeeping was in and out in a flash. About the housekeeping…I am surprised, to tell the truth, that many $200+/night hotels don’t have spotless housekeeping. This is particularly true for American hotels, but I’ve seen it world-wide. Our hotel, the Sheraton Grande Sukhumvit, had by far the cleanest room I’ve stayed in ever. Nice touches like organizing our toiletries on a towel on the sink countertop were standard practice for the place. Random receipts left strewn about were collected and put in a neat stack, clothes were hung up, change put in the valet, newspapers and magazines folded and stacked, shoes lined up, etc. To top it all off…we were staying using points, not cash, and were given a great room with a superb view.

Lots of people bug me in America – that goes without saying. A few people bug me in Thailand. The Indian tailor shop touts who follow me for half a block begging me to come to their stores – they’re pretty annoying. Of course, they look at me and know instantly that I am not going to be able to buy anything “off the rack” in Thailand because of my size. What passes for XXL here is like L in the US. XXXL? Sorry, Sir, XL Biggest. It’s not their fault at all – I am just too big! And this, as I said, the tailors know. The same is true in Hong Kong and they come after me like the tiger goes after the slow, fat deer. But back to Thailand…who else bugs me? The immigration officials. It’s not that they give me a terrible time…but they just have a knack for messing with me. When I was coming in, I was worried about not having enough blank, right-facing pages. I would need two – one for each Visa for China and Vietnam. There were plenty of open boxes for the Thai agent to stamp, but nooooooooooooooooooooooo she had to go and but her big fat greasy purple stamp right smack dab on one of the two open pages. So, you tell me…was she just a complete moron, or was she messing with me? We’ll get back to the immigration officials after a short side-story. It’s related.

I have visions of getting turned back at the airport in Hanoi because I don’t have a right-facing blank page left in my passport. Sure, I’ve got a left-facing page, but, well, you cannot argue your way into a country, and if it’s a right-facing blank page they want… There was only one way to remedy this – go to the American Embassy in Bangkok and get some extra pages. Luckily, the Embassy does this while-you-wait, and for free! Unluckily, there was a reported ‘demonstration’. For this, the cabs were reluctant to go and I took the skytrain and walked 15 minutes. The demonstration was a peaceful group of women sitting down and singing...on the OTHER side of the street! Editor's note: Now in Vietnam, we are heading to dinner and I will continue with the end of the Bangkok journey when we return.

Et tu, salmonella?

Ugh, I've been down with food poisoning for 2 days. I've recovered and will get back to blogging tomorrow when we get to Hanoi. I had a harrowing taxi ride, got hit on by a pharmacy clerk, spend an interesting hour at the U.S. embassy, and found a new medication. Details to follow!

I will take you down to Chinatown, Focker!

Most everything sold in Bangkok that is not edible first starts off in the wholesale alleys of Chinatown. There are lots of Chinese people there, mostly long-settled immigrants. These folks however do not speak Chinese for the most part. Weaving through alleys, pushing along with the throng, Bangkok's Chinatown is an experience you have to have at least once. And if you actually have to buy something (as did Megan), you can make some nice scores. She went on a bead buying rampage. I think she's got enough to make a few hundred pair of earrings.

We stopped to try some Bird's Nest Soup. Yeah, it's bird throw-up. It didn't do anything for me, though. The oyster omlette, however, was great!

Moving though Chinatown there are all kinds of machine shops, small manufacturing nooks, parts-recyclers, and even a few near-empty gleaming stalls with a nice car parked outside and the owner inside being busy doing what looks like to be exactly nothing. Here are some more pictures!

Bird's Nest Soup -- add an almost-raw egg, a gingko nut, and some honey.


Yes, they do make scooters for bad-asses.


A quiet Chinatown alley.


Ice cream, or something like it, always draws a crowd.


Chinatown alley...tight! And yes, people drive scooters down those narrow aisles.

Beating Jet Lag...

...is tough! I'm out at 10pm or so, and up at 5am. Today, at least, I got up at 6am so hopefully I can stay up until 11. Party on! It's Monday, which means I am going to head out to the Chinese Embassy to try and get a visa to visit Shenzhen. I get into Hong Kong too late on Friday to try and get it done there. (This travel is 2 weeks from now, by the way.)

So yesterday we went shopping at MBK, the giant old, cheap) mall with the food court on top. Somehow it just didn't seem as interesting as it has before. Perhaps the thrill of buying fake designer tee shirts has rubbed off, much like the future of their lettering. The food court, however, is pretty good. You buy a bunch of coupons (refundable) and use them to visit different booths and pick up their specialties. Average cost per dish is $1.50. We had three -- Beef noodle soup (too hot!), honey glazed roast duck, and chicken two ways (steamed and fried) with coconut rice. I had a beer which oddly helped keep be out of the "awake but zombified" mental state of the jet-lagged. From there we walked to a few malls, each one being more upscale. Siam Discovery was first, follwed by Paragon. They reminded me of Vegas. Megan bought a handbag and I bought a shirt. I was surprised to find anything that fit me. I got an XXL and it's about the size of a US "Large".

Highlight of the day was the $8.00 1 hour foot massage. After walking around for a couple of days that really hit the spot. For added entertainment, there was an Australian woman tourist who looked like Phil Silvers getting a pedicure a couple of chairs over. It looked like she'd been of a five year barefoot walkabout in the outback and then went straight to this Bangkok salon for a pedicure. If you can remember the scene in "Dumb and Dumber" where they had to use an angle grinder on Jim Carrey's feet...you get the picture. This, of course, created great entertainment for all.

We dropped off the packages at the hotel and I took a short nap while Megan checked her email. Afterward we headed to one of the top-rated seafood places in town. It's so good that a bunch of fake restaurants with similar names have cropped up and slick taxi drivers will ferry unsuspecting passengers there (instead of the real place) for an ill-gotten commission. We, however, made sure we were brought to the genuine article.

Dinner was fantastic! There was a plump, southern crab in a curry chili egg cream sauce that was amazing. I've never had anything like it (the sauce) in taste of texture. Here's a picture from their website:



We also had these fantastic prawns, fried whole in the shell with garlic, chili, sugar, ginger and lemongrass. Those were Megan's favorite. A plate of raw oysters were super-fresh but not spectacular tasting. Their version of Tom Yum Goong was delicious and not too spicy at all. The vegetables were not great, but oh well. The meal was expensive by Thai standards at around $34.

The key to having a good time on a longer trip in BKK is to have a hotel that is both centrally located and right next to an interconnect station for the subway and the skytrain. Bangkok, with it's weather and long streets to explore, can wear you out. Having great public transit right at your door goes a long way to save your energy for actual sightseeing. It's embassy time...more later...

Some pictures

Taking the BART train to SFO. I'm a total convert here.


All the geriatric pre-boards. Look for this line to get longer and longer over time.


How can something be comforting and disquieting at the same time?

Transiting through Hong Kong

Reason # 1317 why "Hong Kong is Da Bombdedest". The overall idea with HK is that you get Asian goodies with Western infrastructure at prices in-between the two. Here's a great example... I get in from my 14 hour flight and head to one of the "pay lounges". Sure, if I were to have been flying Business Class I'd get it for free...but I flew coach. What I want is a shower. Simple enough: US$11. However...I got talked in to the "combination" pacakge for $33. What did I get for $33? I got the $11 shower, for one, so that really means what did I get for the marginal $22 I spent? Well. I got two hours of Internet. That would have cost me another $11 from PCCW (using my own notebook). That gets me down to $11. What did I get for that? Well....they have a mini restaurant and everything is complimentary. Yep...noodles, dim sum, drinks, etc. They also have a private lounge with big cushy leather chairs, etc. So far it sounds pretty good, as a decent lunch in the airport would cost you $15 or so. But wait, there's more! I also got a 15 minute seated massage: Head, neck, shoulders, back. That massage a la carte would have been $20 or so. So there you have it. Come to Hong Kong and should you find yourself with a long layover at the airport, plunk down $33 and get a massage, take a nice hot shower, have a good hot lunch, kick back in a plush leather chair in a private lounge, and Internet to your heart's content. Now if they'd only quickly dry clean and press your clothes while you walked around in a robe. Next year, perhaps!

So Skype has been working like a dream. What is it? It's a computer program and Internet service that allow you to make "phone" calls from PC to PC, telephone to PC (skypein) and PC to telephone skypeout). I have all the services and it's been amazing. While at the lounge, I used SkypeOut to call Cliff. I paid around 3 cents a minute. There was no noticible lag and the sound quality was great on both ends. We talked for about 10 minutes and there were no drop-outs. Later, my friend Michael IMd me when he saw me online and I invited him to call my SkypeIn number (510 962 4442) and see how that worked. It worked great! We talked for 10 minutes also and the sound quality was fantastic. I paid $30 or so for a YEAR of SkypeIn. I got my own voicemail with it, too, no extra charge. SkypeIn is great. Imagine, someone calls Oakland and the "phone" (my PC) rings in Hong Kong...or Bangkok...or wherever I happen to be in the world. This service is fantastic and I feel like it's going to give me a lot of freedom in terms of where I end up "working".

Sitting in the lap of economy

Right now I am in Hong Kong's airport. I am 4 hours in to an 8 hour layover. It was either spend 8 hours in Hong Kong or 8 hours in Bangkok airport. No contest. Anyway, this comes to you courtesy of a free Internet station at gate 24. I cannot use my own notbook, so no pics to upload (yet).

Ah, economy class. I feared it...and for good reason. The seat was small for my expanded size. However, strangely, after an hour or so my body (and psyche) adjusted to that. THAT wasn't the problem.

An old crusty New York lawyer I knew whose only chance to make it to an important function on time was to take the subway said "I've not taken the subway in 25 years!" His secretary told him "Oh, the subway isn't so bad." To which he replied "I don't have any problems utilizing a public conveyence...it's the public I detest." I bet he had it easier that day than I just did.

Let's start of by mentioning that I booked early and got an aisle seat. So two guys want to sit together and ask me to trade my aisle seat for a center seat. I smile and tell them no. The one who asked looked at me in amazement...how could I be so rude as to refuse him? The problem, of course, now I have to sit next to one of these clowns and suffer 14 hours of seat neighbor retribution. Boy, he let me have it. To wit:

- Took his shoes and socks off. Before getting to the airport, I am sure he was sticking he feet up his water buffalo's ass as some sort of goodbye ritual. He then put his feet up on the back of the seat in front of him.

- Worked his leg UNDER MY SEAT, which was already small from a seat brace.

- Spilled his seafood cocktail sauce on his pillow (peasant), then dropped his soaked pillow on my pants.

Ok, bad enough? Now comes the final indignity. You may have guessed it already...

- He gets up out of he seat to go to the bathroom...but...it seems like he couldn't be bothered to wait UNTIL he got to the bathroom. Yes, he had been passing the most noxious gas into his seatcushion, trapping it there with his doubleknit polyester pants. When he stood up, it was like someone opened an old crypt and the funk of forty thousand years attacked with all the power of entropy. To give you an idea, the lady ACROSS the aisle from me covered he nose and looked like she was going to throw up.

All this, of course, is due to my being a racist. When I was in line in San Francisco, I was waiting behind two Indian guys who really, REALLY smelled like Indian food. Like they just got off their jobs in the kitchen of some restaurant and didn't change clothes on the way to the airport. So I made a little prayer..."Dear Lord...please don't put me next to one of those stinky Indian guys!" You can say my prayers were answered...and that I got what I deserved. My next prayer I'll either be less racist or more specific.

I am going to go rent one of those mini rooms and take a shower and read for a bit. I brought some travel guides and a bio of Sam Cooke. I'll get the pics uploaded when I can, although so far there's nothing interesting. Bangkok should change that.

Note: take off your hat when going through security at HKG airport. It's a respect thing. I've done it twice. The first time I thought they were stupid...the second time I thought I was stupid (for forgetting).

Here we go again!

My flight leaves in 16 hours at 1:20am. I am flying to Bangkok via Hong Kong. I will spend a week in Bangkok, then three days in Vietnam, another five days somewhere in Thailand (playing that by ear), then five days in Hong Kong with a day trip to Shenzhen, China.

This trip I am packing light. If I need anything I will buy it in Asia. That might be tough, though, since they don't have stuff for people of my size there. Maybe I'll grab a few things before I go...I have time. Thankfully, I am not rushing today.

I am taking a notebook computer, an MP3 player, a camera, video camera, and that's about it for electronics. I am going to try and take a lot more photos and videos. When I am old I will want to sit in a room, drooling, and replay the fun times of my life. So I need to up the source material collection.

The flight over has an 8 hour layover in Hong Kong. I am looking into renting a small hotel room there and sleeping. I have a slight cold and need as much rest as possible. I've been healthy for a year and got sick right before this trip. Curses!



I've some leftover Hong Kong and Thai money, and that'll come in handy. My current plan is to take BART to the SF Airport tonight. First I'll hop on the TOTALLY FREE shuttle that Emeryville operates. It stops 150 feet from my front door and takes me to BART in about 5 minutes. Then it's 1 hour on BART and I'll be at SFO. I don't ask my friends to drive me to the airport anymore. This way, when they ask me and I do drive them, they owe me one. I like the BART ride, actually, it's very relaxing and you don't have to worry about traffic problems getting to, or at, the airport.